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A Ding from Down Under/Script

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[A man is talking on the pay phones as Jude skates by. When he finishes his conversation, he walks away from the phones, and Jude comes back.]
Jude: "C'mon, pay phones. Big money. Big money." [He checks the phones. The third one has a quarter in its deposit base.] "Free scratch! Sweet!"
[The phone rings. Jude looks around and then picks up.]
Jude: "Hello?"
Callie: "Hello. Could I speak to Jara?"
Jude: [calling to the mall] "Is anyone here named Jara? Jara?" [returning to the call] "Nope, not here." [The girl bursts into tears.] "I–uh–wait! Don't cry!" [yelling] "JJAAAAARRRRRRRAAAAAAA!!!"
[Jude's yell echoes about the mall but gets no response.]
Jude: "I–uh–why are you so upset?"
Callie: "I'm sorry. It wasn't anything you said."
Jude: "Good, 'cause all I said was Jara, and you said that first."
Callie: [chuckling] "Yeh. I did. Well, I should let you go."
Jude: "I don't have any plans. Wanna talk?"

The opening credits roll.
The title of this episode is
A Ding from Down Under'

[Jen is working at the Penalty Box.]
Jen: [handing over a customer's bags] "Have a good day!" [Suddenly, paintballs fly by her, and she gasps. She turns around and is hit.] "Ow!" [Someone laughs.]
Coach Halder: "Ha ha ha! Yeah!"

[Nikki, Caitlin, Jen and Jonesy are sitting around the table.]
Nikki: "So what's with the paint?"
Jen: "Remember Coach Halder's psycho son Cory? Well he and his dad are in training for some paintball war games thing, and using me for target practice!"
Jonesy: "That's killer! Paintball wars are awesome!"
Jen: [unenthused] "Yeah. Really cool."
Caitlin: "Are they allowed to do that?"
Jen: "No, but they own the store! When I told them to cut it out, Coach Halder gave me a penalty for being such a 'girly girl'. Ugh! I hate that guy!" [She sighs.] "Well my break's over. Back to the front lines."
Nikki: [as Jen leaves] "Go get 'em, soldier!"
Wyatt: [walking up to his friends] "Hey." [He has a giant wet spot on his sweater.]
Nikki: "Hey. Is it stain day today?"
Wyatt: "This has officially been the worst day of my life."
Jonesy: "Let me guess. You failed an exam."
Wyatt: "No."
Nikki: "Your old bed-wetting problem come back?"
Caitlin: "Oh, you do that?"
Wyatt: "No!"
Jonesy: "Finally realized that the responsible guy never gets the girl?"
Wyatt: "No. Wait, they don't?"
Caitlin: "C'mon, Wyatt. It can't be that bad."
Wyatt: "Wanna bet? First, I slept in. So I was rushing to get ready, and I stepped on my guitar and broke it."
Caitlin: "Ouch."
Nikki: "Whoa."
Jonesy: "Dang."
Wyatt: "Then I rush outside to grab my bike–to find that I left the garage door open last night and my bike's gone."
Caitlin: "Oops!"
Nikki: "Wow, that's bad."
Jonesy: "Dang."
Wyatt: "I finally get here, grab a coffee and run to Underground, where I trip and my very-much-needed coffee goes flying out of my hand."
Caitlin: "Oh."
Nikki: "Ouch."
Jonesy: "Dang."
Nikki: "Okay, that's enough with the dang there, Tex!"
Wyatt: "Wait, it gets better. I didn't just drop my coffee..."
[Wyatt flashes back. He sees himself stubbing his toe on a cardboard box and tripping. The coffee goes flying.]
Memory Wyatt: [in slow motion] "Noooooooooooooo–"
[The coffee splats down all over one of Wayne's movies.]
Nikki: "Oh no."
Jonesy: "You did what?"
Caitlin: "Is that bad?"
Jonesy: "Samurai Space Warriors is the first movie to ever take place in space! It was a first-run collectors edition! They don't make it on VHS anymore!"
Wyatt: "And it was at that point that Wayne fired me."
Nikki: "Do you think he might forgive you when he cools down?"
[Wyatt remembers Wayne's last words to him.]
Memory Wayne: "This movie meant more to me than your life!"
Wyatt: "I somehow doubt it."
Jonesy: "Whoop-de-doo! You got axed from a job!"
Wyatt: "Two in a row, actually. That won't look good on a resume."
Jonesy: "Please! It's great for the resume!"
Nikki: "Oh, do enlighten us. This sounds interesting."
Jonesy: "Look at Nikki, for example. One job. That's her resume. Nikki Wong, Khaki Barn, end of story."
Nikki: "Wow. Never thought of it that way. Is that how people think of me?" [Caitlin laughs.] "What are you laughing at? You're Caitlin Cooke, Lemonhead."
[Caitlin looks up at her embarrassing hat and sighs.]
Jonesy: "To Nikki's next employer, her only skill will be folding sweaters. When someone looks at my resume and sees all the places I've worked, they see that I can do everything."
Nikki: "Okay, that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. I can do more than fold sweaters."
Jonesy: "Can you?"
[Nikki's eyes bulge as she considers that Jonesy could be right.]
Caitlin: "You'll find a job, Wyatt. You're smart, hardworking, and you're friendly. What's not to like?"
Wyatt: [getting up, depressed] "Thanks, guys. Wish me luck."
Caitlin: "Luck!"
[Wyatt leaves to search for new employment.]

[Jude is hanging out by the public phones, talking to Callie.]
Callie: "I've been surfing since I was six. It's not that different from skateboarding, it's just on water."
Jude: "That is so cool!"
Callie: "When you come to Australia, I'll take you on my own board. There's a little piece missing out of it where I got bit by a shark. Just missed my ankle, too."
Jude: [excited] "Surfing shark-fighting girl from Australia, you're awesome!"
Callie: [giggling] "Thanks Jude."
Jude: "I heard that in Australia, when they flush the toilet, the water spins counterclockwise. Did you know that?"
Callie: "Uh, yeh, I live here?"
Jude: "Okay. So, Jara was your boyfriend?"
Callie: "Yeh. His family moved to Canada last week, so we broke up. I had his new number on a piece of paper, but it went through the wash so I can't really make it out."
Jude: "Bummer. You sound pretty cool. If you lived here, I wouldn't move away from you."
Callie: "Thanks Jude. You sound cool too."

[Jen is carrying a box of tennis balls through the Penalty Box when she gets shot in the back several times and falls.]
Coach Halder: "Bang on! Good aim, Cory! Halders rule!" [They bump chests.] "Masterson, clean up this mess and stop lying down on the job."
Jen: "Oh, brother." [She gets up as the Halders leave.]
Coach Halder: "You see what I did there? I said 'stop lying down on the job' because she was lying down."
Cory: "Good one, Dad!"
Jen: "This is going to be a really long week."

[Jude skates up to the Big Squeeze.]
Jude: "Dudes, dudettes."
Caitlin: "Hi! Where have you been hiding?"
Jude: "Hanging out with my new girlfriend."
Caitlin: "What?!?"
Jonesy: "Good man!"
Nikki: "That was fast. Well who is she?"
Caitlin: "Where did you meet her?"
Jude: "Her name's Callie."
Jonesy: "Is she a hottie?"
Caitlin: "Can we meet her?"
Jude: "Definitely. Follow me."
[Jude skates away.]

[Wyatt is at a burger shop, interviewing for a new job.]
Tim: "Okay Wyatt, I'm Tim."
Wyatt: "Hi Tim!"
Tim: "Did I tell you that you could call me Tim?"
Wyatt: [confused] "Well that was how you introduced yours–"
Tim: "You can call me sir. Wyatt, there are three ways to do things here: the right way, the wrong way, and my way."
Wyatt: "Is your way the right way?"
Tim: "Absolutely."
Wyatt: "So wouldn't there just be two ways to do things then?"
Tim: [standing up] "Oh, I'm sorry. Are you interviewing me today? Because I thought I was interviewing you." [calling to the kitchen] "I don't hear any singing!"
Employees: "My burger lies over the ocean/My burger lies over the sea/And if I could send you my burger/How yummy and tasty it'd be!" [The employees continue the refrain.] "My burger lies over the ocean..."
Tim: "Do you like music, Wyatt?"
Wyatt: [regaining his confidence] "Actually I sing, play guitar, and write my own songs."
Tim: "Are you going to answer my question or just waste my time?"
Wyatt: [giving up] "I like music."
Tim: "Good. Some people say it's silly to sing for the customers. Do you think it's silly to sing for the customers."
Wyatt: [unsure of how to answer] ""
Tim: "I do. I think it's silly. That's why we don't sing for them."
Wyatt: [confused] "You don't."
Tim: "No. We don't. We sing for the meat. You talk to a houseplant and it grows faster–fact! If you sing to meat, it tastes better, also fact." [handing Wyatt a huge book] "This is the Burger Bible, it has all of our songs in it. Learn them." [calling to the kitchen] "Let's get that singing 8% louder, people!"
Employees: [louder] "My burger lies over the ocean..." [The refrain goes on and on and on.]
Tim: [to Wyatt] "You start tomorrow."
Wyatt: "Thank you! I think."
Employees: "...and if I could send you my burger..."

[Jude is waiting by the public phones. With him are Jonesy, Caitlin, and Nikki.]
Nikki: "I thought we were going to meet your girlfriend."
Jude: "She could call any minute."
Nikki: "Call from where?"
Jude: "Australia."
Jonesy: "Whoa! Back up a minute, dude. You don't even know what this girl looks like?"
Jude: "No. She dialed the wrong number and we started hanging out."
Jonesy: "On the phone?!? Dude, she could be a dog! Or a dingo!"
Jude: "No way, bro. She told me what she looks like. Sounds like she looks like Caitlin."
Caitlin: "Oh. She sounds pretty. I like her."
Jonesy: "She could be lying?"
Caitlin: "Well I think it's romantic."
Jonesy: "I think it's nuts. How are you supposed to score with a girl halfway around the world?"
Nikki: [disgusted] "Jonesy, you know you really are a pig sometimes."
Caitlin: "Wait. I thought pay phones aren't supposed to accept incoming calls."
Jude: "Guess this one's busted."
Nikki: "When someone realizes it's broken, won't they get it fixed?"
Jude: [shocked] "They would do that?"
Caitlin: "Don't draw unnecessary attention to the phone, and it'll be fine."
Jude: [hugging the phone] "Don't worry phone, I'll protect you."

[Everyone in the gang but Jude is around the table.]
Wyatt: "Guess what? I just got hooked up with a job at Burger McFlipster's."
Caitlin: "The place where they sing about their burgers?"
Jonesy: "No way!" [He bursts into laughter.] "I feel sorry for you, man. We always make fun of those poor suckers. And now you're one of them!"
Wyatt: "It was the only place that would hire me, and I need the money to fix my guitar!"
Jen: "At least no one will shoot paintballs at you there!"
Nikki: "Yeah, and it'll make a great story when you're famous."
Wyatt: "Thanks. Well, I'm off to work."
Jonesy: [singing and dancing] "I love burgers yes I do! I love burgers how 'bout you?"
[Wyatt groans and moves off.]

[At work, Wyatt is serving Kristen and Kirsten.]
Wyatt: [singing] "Have you ever seen a burger on a yummy yummy bun?/I'll serve it up with fries and we'll have a little fun/Put your hands in your pockets and your pockets in your pants/And all of the staff will do the Combo Dance."
Wyatt, Kristen, and Kirsten: "La la la la la la la la! La la la la la la la la!"
Wyatt: "Put your hands in your pockets and your pockets in your pants/And all of the staff will doooooooooooooooooo...the Burger Combo Dance!" [Kristen and Kirsten squeal, delighted.]
Kristen and Kirsten: "Yay!"
Kirsten: "Okay, he's new here, and so cute! Usually I find those songs totally annoying."
Kristen: "Oh, totally!"
[The two girls suddenly look at each other oddly before grabbing their food, grinning awkwardly, and leaving.]
Tim: "I don't recall that song being in the Burger Bible."
Wyatt: "Well–no–it isn't. I just kinda made it up."
Tim: "You've got a brain, Wyatt. I like that in a person. Keep it up."
[Wyatt smiles.]

[At the Penalty Box, Jen is showing golf gear to a customer.]
Jen: "It's the lightest driver we have."
Coach Halder: "Cover me!"
[Jen ducks, and a paintball flies by, splatting onto the chest of the customer.]
Penalty Box Customer: "Oh! Ow!"
Jen: "You missed me–" [She gets shot.] "Ow!"
Coach Halder: "Halders rule!"

[Stuart Goldstein is on the phone.]
Stuart's Wife: "Stuart, if you don't get me my milk, we're through!"
Stuart Goldstein: [worried] "Ooh, oh boy." [Jude is quivering on the floor.]
Stuart's Wife: "Now I want you to get me my milk!"
Stuart Goldstein: "Okay. I should go." [Jude leaps up, happy.]
Stuart's Wife: "That's right, you should go, you little–"
Stuart Goldstein: "Before I do–" [Jude slumps.] "–should I get the milk in the carton or in the bag?"

Wyatt: [singing at work] "The burgers here are mighty fine, the shakes are really sweet/The best part about working here are the pretty girls I meet."
[The girls in line cheer him. Jonesy comes in and gapes at the sight of Wyatt being cheered by many girls.]

[Later, Jonesy is at the Big Squeeze, describing the scene to his friends.]
Jonesy: "Girls were all over him. He was like a rock-n-roll meat poet!"
[Jude skates up and rams into the lemon. He lies bent over on it.]
Caitlin: [worried] "Are you okay?"
Jude: "Whoa, must've nodded off on the wheels."
Nikki: "You look awful!"
Jude: "Had to be here when the mall opened at six for cleaning this morning. I didn't want to miss Callie in case she tried to call again."
Caitlin: "It must be hard to always have to talk on a pay phone. Why don't you call her on your cell?"
Jude: "Call Australia, are you crazy? Australia is like, at least, five hours away!"
Caitlin: "Yeah, that would cost a lot."
Jude: "Gotta run. Later dudes." [He skates away, and Wyatt walks up.]
Wyatt: "Well, you are officially looking at the new assistant manager of Burger McFlipster's."
Caitlin: "Wow! That was fast."
Wyatt: "Tim says that sales go up 23.6% when I'm working."
Jonesy: "Wyatt, I'm really proud of you."
Wyatt: [waiting] "But?"
Jonesy: "No buts, just proud."
Wyatt: "Uh, thanks, Jonesy."
Jonesy: "Not only do I respect you, Wyatt, but I think Burger McFlipster's is a fine establishment."
Nikki: "Okay, what's with the mind games?"
Jonesy: "What? I'm just supporting my friends."
Caitlin: "Stop it, Jonesy! You're freaking me out."
Wyatt: "Yeah, I thought you hated McFlipster's."
Jonesy: "Never! I love that place. Oh hey, just wondering, for argument's sake, as assistant manager do you have a say in the hiring of staff?"
Wyatt: "Oh, I get it."
Nikki: "Don't do it, Wyatt."
Caitlin: "Be strong. Don't look in his eyes."
[Wyatt's eyes slide to Jonesy's, and he gasps. Jonesy is giving off a puppy dog look.]
Nikki: "Too late."
Wyatt: "I...guess I could ask."
Jonesy: "Thanks, boss! I won't let you down."
Wyatt: "Why do I get the feeling I'm going to regret this?"

[The sales counter at the Penalty Box is splattered with paint.]
Jen: [using the counter as a barrier] "I can't handle another five days of this, Coach Halder!"
Coach Halder: "Get in the fight or get off the field, Masterson!"

[Jonesy's first job is to mop the floors of Burger McFlipster's.]
Jonesy: "What gives with the Joe job, dude?"
Tim: "First off, I am not your dude. I am sir."
Jonesy: "Okay, sir. I think my talents would be better served dealing with the hottie–uh–customers directly."
Tim: "If you got a job at the airport, they wouldn't let you fly a plane on your first day, would they?"
Jonesy: "They would if I was a pilot."
Tim: "Are you a pilot, Jonesy?"
[Jonesy looks from side to side to see if he's being pranked and then starts mopping. Tim leaves, and Jonesy notices some female customers.]
Jonesy: "Hello, ladie–whoa!" [He slips and falls over.] "Ow!"
[The girls laugh, but stop when they see Wyatt.]
Kirsten: "Oh look, there he is! It's Wyatt!"
Chrissy: "Take my phone number!"
[As a herd, the girls migrate towards Wyatt.]

[Jude is setting up a tent by the public phones. Nikki walks up.]
Nikki: "Dare I ask?"
Jude: "I need a place to chill while I guard the phone. I never really know when she's gonna call."
Nikki: "Uh, I think Ron the Rent-a-Cop might notice a tent set up in the mall."
Jude: [with a roll of caution tape] "That's what the tape is for."

[It is 10:05 and Jude is snoring away. The phone rings, and he wakes up slightly.]
Jude: [groggy] "Somebody get the door." [waking up] "Callie! Wait! Wait!" [He fights his way out of his tent and picks up the phone.] "Hello? Callie?"
Callie: "Jude? Boy, have I missed you!"
Jude: [yawning] "I've missed you too!"
Callie: "I just took my first driving class–" [Jude falls asleep.] "–I should have been studying this week for my math test–Jude? Are you listening?"
Jude: [yawning] "Yes, Mom."
Callie: [offended] "Mum? I wait all day to talk to you and you can't even pay attention? I'm hanging up the phone now."
Jude: "Huh? Oh, no! I mean, I was–"
Callie: "Forget it! You obviously aren't in the mood to talk. Call you back when you're actually listening."
Jude: "No, Callie, wait!" [He's speaking to a dial tone.] "NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

[Jonesy and Wyatt are in Jude's tent, playing cards.]
Jonesy: "Seven of hearts?"
Wyatt: "Ha ha ha ha! Last card...I win! Ha ha! Bloody knuckles or a date with taco Julie?"
Jonesy: [whimpering] "I'll take the bloody knuckles."
Wyatt: "Okay." [Jonesy gets hit hard.]
Jonesy: "GYAAA-HEEAA-HEEAA-HEEAA!!!" [pained] "Dude, you cheated."
Jude: [crawling into the tent] "Thanks for phonesitting, guys. I really needed that bathroom break."
Wyatt: "This is a cool pad and all, Jude, but you've been here for two days now, and it's getting a"
Jonesy: "Stinky."
Wyatt: "Yeah."
Jonesy: "You do realize that there are girls on this side of the planet to date?"
Jude: "You don't get it. She's gorgeous, easy to talk to, and her accent is really cool."
Wyatt: "Yeah...hang in there, bro. We better get back to work." [He and Jonesy leave the tent. Wyatt whispers once they're immediately outside.] "He's gone squirrelly."
Jonesy: "Oh, fully nuts."

[Coach Halder is looking for Jen. Thankfully, he's not armed with a gun.]
Coach Halder: "Masterson? Masterson?" [Jen peeps up from behind the counter.] "Oh, there you are. Just wanted to let you know that Cory and I have finished our training. We just wanted to thank you, Masterson, not only were you a tough target but you were the best team player I know. If we win that trophy, I'll see to it that your name goes on it too." [Jen, slowly gaining confidence in the truce, rises until she's standing.]
Jen: "Thank you Coach Halder. I hope you and Cory win that–" [She gets shot.] "Aah!"
Coach Halder: "Ha! Let your guard down there, Masterson! Nice shot, Cory! Now we're good!"
Jen: [steaming with rage] "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

[The girls are once again cheering Wyatt.]
Wyatt: "Grill, grill, grill your burger/Gently on the flame/You know I'll make the best on Earth/'Cause Wyatt is my name." [The girls cheer.] "Thank you, thank you ladies. You really are too kind."
[Jonesy sees this and whimpers before mopping the floor furiously to take out his aggression.]
Tim: "Jonesy." [He holds up the Burger Bible.] "Learn it. Tomorrow you start behind the grill."
Jonesy: "Yes! Ladies, here I come."

[Jude and Nikki are playing cards in his tent.]
Jude: "Do you have any threes?"
Nikki: "Okay. I'm gonna give it to you straight. This tent is gross. I'm sitting on a chicken wing! How much longer are you gonna wait for her call?"
Jude: "As long as I have to."
Nikki: [leaving] "Well, you're gonna go crazy in this tent all by yourself."
Jude: "But I love her!" [looking around the tent] "I'm not–gonna go–crazy."

[A janitor sweeps up at night in the mall. Jude is still in his tent, but strange voices are coming from inside.]
Caitlin Puppet: "Look at me! I'm so pretty!"
[Jude has indeed gone crazy, having made sock puppets to resemble his friends.]
Jen Puppet: "Hey Caitlin! Can I give you some advice? 'Cause I'm Jen, and I like to boss everyone around."
Wyatt Puppet: "I could really use some coffee, bro."
Jonesy Puppet: "I have no job! Buy me one too!"
Nikki Puppet: "Broke again, huh Chonesy? What a surprise."
Jen Puppet: "Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!"

[Jude is sleeping in his tent. Suddenly, a hand reaches in and grabs him.]
Jude: "Huh? No!"
Ron: "Alright, that's it. The mall's closed and you're going home."
Jude: "But I have a girlfriend in Australia!"
Ron: "Well, we're not in Australia, maggot. Now MOVE IT!"
[Ron carries Jude away.]

[Jonesy is about to start work at the sales counter.]
Wyatt: "Well, here come your first customers."
Jonesy: [singing horribly] "Fries, shakes, condiments, Jonesy's on the scene!/Burgers and dogs, burgers and dogs! Excellent cuisine!"
Kirsten: "Ew! I feel like barfing."
Kristen: "Ew, I hate that."
Kirsten: "Let's go to Wonder Taco!"
Jonesy: [off-key] "Come again soon!"
Wyatt: "Relax, bro!"
Jonesy: "Not now. Here comes lucky contestant number 3!" [He goes over to Tara.] "I'm grill, grilling for you! And I'm sure you'll like what I do!"
Tara: "Ew. No. You're a greasy loser." [She leaves.]
Jonesy: [trying to sing] "Come back so-ooo-on!"
Tim: "Wyatt, can I talk to you?"
[The manager leads Wyatt away, and Jonesy's eyes bulge. He's seen the writing on the wall.]

[Jen angrily storms into the restroom. She looks at herself in the mirror; her eyes are bloodshot and her work uniform stained with paint. She screams a banshee yell and proceeds to apply war paint and don a military helmet.]
Jen: "You called down the thunder..."
[After a long pause, she resumes her train of thought.]
Jen: "Well you've got it!"

[Jen creeps around the Penalty Box, hiding behind barricades. Coach Halder doesn't notice.]
Coach Halder: [instructing a customer] "Just take that up to the cash, sir. They'll look after you up there." [Paintballs explode into his gut.] "Ooh, I've been hit! Medic! Medic!"

[Jude is waiting by the phones, desperately needing a bathroom break. Nikki walks up to him.]
Nikki: "Hey."
Jude: "Finally, I texted you like five times!"
Nikki: "I will watch this phone for two minutes, so you'd better move it."
[Jude moves off to use the facilities.]

[Cory walks through the Penalty Box, gun in one hand, walkie-talkie in the other.]
Coach Halder: [through the walkie-talkie] "It's Masterson. She's snapped! Be on your toes. Stay sharp, Cory. Stay sharp."
[Jen leaps out from behind the counter on rollerblades and skates forward. She shoots Cory down and continues on. When Cory gets up, he's taken from behind and falls again.]
Cory: "AAAAAH!"

[A phone rings.]
Nikki: "Jude!"
[Jude can't hear her, as he is otherwise occupied. Nikki decides to pick up.]
Nikki: "Hello?"
Callie: "Hello? Can I speak to Jude?"
Nikki: "Oh hey! This is his friend Nikki. He, uh, he just stepped out."
Callie: "Can you give him a message for me? My boyfriend Jara finally called and he hates it there and he's coming back to Aus! Isn't that great?"
Nikki: [let down] "Oh. Yeah. Don't you think you should tell Jude this yourself?"
Callie: "Oh, he won't mind." [Nikki looks down and is startled to see the puppets of the gang.] "It's not like anything really could have happened between us. We're on opposite ends of the world! Do you think you could tell him bye for me?"
Nikki: [depressed] "Oh. Sure thing."
Callie: "Thanks. You're a mate."

[And now, for an original scene transition...]
Wyatt: [moving across the screen singing] "Have you ever seen a burger on a yummy yummy bun?"

[Jonesy and Wyatt are sitting in a booth.]
Wyatt: "Jonesy, I know you've heard it a hundred times, but Tim feels that maybe you aren't exactly–"
Jonesy: "Wait. Wyatt. Can I try something I've always wanted to do?"
Wyatt: "Um, okay."
[Jonesy stands up and clears his throat.]
Jonesy: "I QUIT!" [after a beat] "Wow, that felt good."
Wyatt: [chuckling] "So are we cool?"
Jonesy: "Totally. It wasn't my scene. You go get those burger-eatin' girls, Wyatt. You go get 'em."

[Jude comes back from his bathroom break to see Ron forcibly removing the phone.]
Jude: "No!" [He runs up to Ron.] "Please? Please?" [begging] "You can't do this!"
Ron: "There ain't nothin' in this world that's–" [ripping it out of the wall] "–free, punk."
[Ron walks away with the pay phone.]
Nikki: "Sorry, Jude. But I did get a chance to talk to her before they fi–"
Jude: "Really? That's awesome! What'd she say? Does she miss me? I bet she does."
Nikki: [trying to come up with a lie] "Uh–Callie got–um–accepted into the–Australian–astronaut program. She–sa-said to say goodbye, and that you really meant a lot to her."
Jude: "Really? That's cool. Especially since she just got her driver's permit."
Nikki: "Don't worry, Jude. You'll find your surfer girl. I know it."
Jude: "Thanks, Nikki. Let me buy you a lemonade."
[The two friends walk off to go get a lemon drink and hopefully meet up with some other friends.]

Season 2 Scripts
Going UndergroundDeadbeat Poets SocietyCareer DayFish and Make UpAwake the Wyatt WithinUnhappy AnniversaryPillow TalkIn a Retail Wonderland...Midnight MadnessWelcome to the Darth SideThe New GuyMajor UnfaithfulnessWaiting to Ex-SaleLosing Your LemonThe HuntedLights OutA Ding from Down UnderThe Wedding DestroyersThe Lords of MalltownJonesy's Low MojoSmarten UpDirty WorkOver ExposedA Crime of FashionSpring FlingGirlie BoysSnow Job
Seasons: Season 1Season 2Season 3Season 4Hour-Long Specials
See also: Episode Guide

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