Bicker Me Not is the 70th episode of 6teen and the 18th episode of the third season. It aired in Canada on February 10, 2008, and remains unaired in the United States.
Jonesy accidentally destroys the marriage of George and Gracie Bickerson when trying to sell them a hot tub. Nikki is shocked that he's done something so horrible, even by accident, and refuses to talk to him until he gets the Bickersons back together. In addition, due to assuming the Bickersons are his grandparents and misunderstanding the grandfather paradox, Jude begins to think he's disappearing from the world. Meanwhile, Caitlin finds out about her co-worker Kevin, whom she's never met.
Jonesy's new job is at a home improvement store, selling tubs. At the moment, he has two possible customers lined up, but they seem more interested in bickering with each other than on getting a new tub. Eventually, the bickering gets to Jonesy while he's going through his sales pitch, and he tosses in a line suggesting that they made a mistake a long time ago by getting married and they should deal with it by getting a new, comfortable tub to soak in. Unfortunately for him, the part of this suggestion that they take to heart is his suggestion that they made a huge mistake in getting married, and they split up.
When Jonesy relates the story to his friends, they are shocked that he split up the Bickersons, even by accident. This annoys Nikki to such an extent that she refuses to talk to Jonesy until he gets them back together. However, Nikki isn't the most shaken by this news; Jude remembers that his grandparents got married fifty years ago, but he never met them because they were revolutionaries who went into hiding before he was born. He soon connects the history of the Bickersons to the history of his grandparents, and comes to the conclusion that the Bickersons are his grandparents.
However, this isn't the oddest leap of logic he makes: through misunderstanding the Grandfather paradox, Jude comes to the conclusion that the breakup of the Bickersons means that he'll cease to exist if the Bickersons don't get back together. Jen tries to correct Jude on this matter, but Jude isn't listening, and instead slumps to the floor in despair.
Later, at the Big Squeeze, Caitlin finds a fancy gymbag abandoned by the co-worker who works the other shift. Upon learning that this person is a guy, and a guy with good taste at that, she starts to fall in love, and decides to write a note for him to find. After doing so, she finds Gracie Bickerson at the stand, wishing to buy a lemonade. However, the depressed state of Gracie touches Caitlin, and Caitlin decides to give Gracie a makeover.
When Caitlin finishes, Gracie looks much younger. However, something is needed to complete the look, according to Caitlin: a new look. And, being the fashionista she is, she knows where to take Gracie: the Khaki Barn. When she gets Gracie there, Nikki is initially unwilling to help, as she thinks that this will end as a trainwreck. However, at Caitlin's insistence, she goes along with the plan.
George, meanwhile, has taken a job at the Gigantoplex, as that was his first job a long, long time ago. As Jude tails him around, he sees that George is doing okay without Gracie. This worries Jude, as he thinks that he may not be able to get George back together with Gracie.
Gracie, meanwhile, has gotten an outfit that matches that of the Clones. At that moment, they walk up, and upon seeing her are impressed by how she looks. Chrissy is the most impressed, coming to the conclusion that Gracie will bring in another subset of customers and hires her on the spot. This causes the Clones and Gracie to squeal in unison until Gracie's back gives out, forcing her to take sit down. While sitting, Nikki remarks that the way she's behaving is odd, leading Gracie to insult her and the two to get into an argument which rejuvinates Gracie and leaves Nikki annoyed.
The next day, Jude goes to Jonesy for help and finds him soaking the tub he was unable to sell to the Bickersons. Jonesy is willing to help, but it's not because of Jude's worries; rather, it's because Nikki is still refusing to speak to him, which annoys him immensely. At that moment, Jonesy's boss comes by and fires him for using the tub, so Jonesy uses the free time to talk to George at the movie theater. Unfortunately, George isn't interested in getting back together with Gracie–until Gracie comes by, looking amazing and interesting him again.
The friends (sans Jonesy) meet at the Big Squeeze that afternoon. Nikki looks horrible, and it's because Gracie keeps baiting her into arguments and then draining her energy by doing so. At that moment, Gracie comes by, insults Nikki, and then argues with her. This frustrates Nikki enormously, and soon she's hiding under the table. This is the position she's in when Jonesy comes by with good news: he's managed to get George interested in Gracie again. However, at this point Nikki is on the verge of a full on mental breakdown, which worries Jonesy.
Fortunately, Jen has a plan to get the Bickerson's back together. She puts Jude in charge of stealthily delivering invitations using his "invisibility" and organizes a romantic dinner just for the two. However, when they show up, they immediately begin arguing with and insulting each other. This causes Nikki to start insulting Jonesy, as Jonesy's plan didn't work, which leads to Jonesy and Nikki having a bickerfest right alongside George and Gracie.
As it turns out, though, Jonesy's plan did work, as all the bickering reminds George and Gracie why they fell in love, and they get back together again. Soon, they're walking hand in hand and insulting each other in tandem. As the episode ends, Jonesy asks his girlfriend if she thinks they'll be like that in fifty years, and Nikki replies that they will if they're lucky.
Sub-Plot: Caitlin's Unseen Co-Worker
After hearing about how Jonesy broke up the Bickersons, Caitlin arrives at the Big Squeeze only to find a fancy gymbag that belongs to somebody named Kevin sitting on the counter. After Jen suggests that the bag belongs to the person who works the other shift at the lemon, Caitlin decides to leave him a note and hope that he responds. The next day, it seems as if there has been no response, as all that was left behind was a blank sheet of paper. However, when Caitlin goes to write him a note on it, she bumps her blender full of lemon juice over on the note, revealing that it was written in invisible ink.
In response, she answers the questionaire he left on the back, and when he writes her another note, she decides to meet him. However, they have trouble meeting; first, when she schedules the meeting for a break, she can't find him because, as Jen points out, she didn't specify whose break. Then, when she says that they'll meet by the fountain at seven, she forgets to specify whether she meant A.M. or P.M. Finally, though, she meets him when he comes by the Big Squeeze, only for him to not be interested in her. The reason he's not interested is because, as Gracie puts it, "he plays for the other team."
Jonesy: So you made a terrible mistake getting married all those years ago. We get it. Why not soak your problems away in your very own stand-in soak tub? Gracie: The kid's got a point. We are just not right for each other. Jonesy: What? No, I— George: Fifty years together! What were we thinking? Jonesy: Whoa, I didn't mean— Gracie: I'm sorry, George. George: So am I, Gracie. Goodbye. (George and Gracie go their separate ways.) Jonesy: Wait, come back! Does this mean you don't want the tub?
Jen: Let me get this straight. You broke up a fifty-year marriage in your rush to sell a bathtub? Jonesy: It would've been a sweet commission. Caitlin: What fifty-year marriage? Wyatt: George and Gracie, a.k.a. the Bickersons. Nikki: Jonesy, they're really old. How could you? Caitlin: It's hard enough dating when you're sixteen. Imagine how hard it'll for them. Nikki: Fix it with George and Gracie, or I'm not speaking to you! Jonesy: But Nikki— (Nikki holds up her hand.) Argh!
Jude: Dudes, what if George and Gracie are my grandparents? If they break up, I might never be born! Jen: What? No, Jude, it doesn't work like that. See— Jude: A Jude-less world? That makes no sense! Jen: Neither does this. Even if they are your grandparents, it doesn't mean that you— Jude: Dudes, I need to be born! Jen: Okay, I give up!
George: It feels good to be rid of the old ball and chain. Heh. Now I can get back to what I was doing before Gracie came along and ruined my whole stinkin' life! Jude:(worriedly) Dude's happy without the Missus. This could mean the world will soon be Jude-less!
Nikki: Toot toot! Train wreck: all aboard!
Nikki: Hopping, ee-ing, where's the bickering and complaining? Jen: Maybe Gracie's happy. Nikki: Well, she's not acting like herself. Gracie: What's it to you, girlfriend? Kirsten: Nice use of the lingo, Gracie! Nikki: You wanna succumb to peer pressure, be my guest. Gracie: This from a girl who doesn't even know where to put an earring. Nikki: It's called a nose ring! Gracie: It's called a staph infection! Nikki: You're not my mother! Gracie: Thank heavens for small mercy. Nikki: Ugh! Gracie: Wow, I feel better now! Thanks. Caitlin: Seems like she's back to her old self.
Gracie: That is so fetch, girlfriend. Nikki: Oh no. Here she comes. Caitlin: Hey, Gracie. Looking good! Gracie: Too bad I can't say the same about Nikki's hair! Nikki: Ugh, can't you just leave it alone? I'm on a break. Gracie: When I was your age, we didn't take breaks. Nikki: Well, child labor laws have improved since the Industrial Revolution. Gracie: What an attitude on this one! Heh, no wonder her boyfriend left. (Kirsten and Chrissy laugh.) Nikki: He didn't leave. We're just not talking! Gracie: Ah, same diff! Nikki: ARGH! (She slams her head onto the table.)
Jude:(smacking his head with his skateboard) Ow, totally solid. I exist!
Caitlin: Guys, help me convince Kevin we're meant for each other! Jen: Well... Wyatt: Uh... Jonesy: You see— Gracie: Oh, get with it, girlfriend. Kevin plays for the other team! Caitlin: What? (A look of understanding crosses her face.) Oh! Gracie: Don't waste the pretty, like I did. George: Can't waste what you didn't have in the first place! Gracie:(sighs) "I really missed you, Georgey Porgey. (She kisses George.) George: Right back at ya, Gracie Spacey Big-Fat-Facey! Gracie: Had to go and ruin it! George: I just call 'em like I see 'em. (He and Gracie walk off.) Jonesy: Think we'll ever be like that? Nikki: If we're lucky, Jonesy Wonesy!
Jonesy's job: bathtub salesman Reason for firing: He was caught bathing in an expensive tub.
This is the third appearance of the Bickersons. They were introduced in Smarten Up, although Gracie was initially named Mrs. Bingham while George was not yet named. The couple then appeared in 2-4-1 when they got work at Burger McFlipster's.
"Here Comes the Bride" can be heard when George and Gracie break up with each other at the beginning of this episode. It is used there to underline them breaking up after fifty years of marriage.
This episode suggests that the Galleria Mall has been around since at least the 1950s because George reveals that before he and Gracie got married, he worked as an usher at the Gigantoplex, during which he claims that movie theater only had one screen.
George claims that Gracie made him quit working at the theater because she didn't consider it a "real" job.
For those who don't what the "Grandfather Paradox" is: in a nutshell, it's basically where if you travel back in time and prevent your grandparents from ever meeting (it doesn't matter if they're your maternal or paternal grandparents), you'll prevent yourself from ever being born.
As Jude's friends were presumably going to explain to him, even if George and Gracie are actually his grandparents, he won't cease to exist if they break up in the current time period.
Nikki claims that Jonesy will never get her into a short skirt. However, in "The List," Nikki wears an extremely short skirt in order to try and mess with Jonesy's head.