Kylie Smylie

General	Script	Gallery

"Quit It"

"Kylie Smylie"

"The List"

"Kylie Smylie"
Episode name reference to/pun on: The YouTube user named "Kylie Smiley."
Season 4, Episode 86
Airdate:	CAN: October 15, 2009 USA: May 10, 2010
Directed by:	Karen Lessmann
Written by:	Laurie Elliott
Story Editors:	Alex Ganetakos (supervising)
Episode Guide

Kylie Smylie is the 86th episode of 6teen and the 6th episode of the fourth season. It aired on Teletoon on October 15, 2009, and on Cartoon Network on May 10, 2010. Kylie Smylie, a famous pop star, holds an essay contest where the winner gets to spend a day with her. Caitlin wins, so Kylie comes to the mall and hangs out with her. This leads to Jen becoming obsessed with getting Kylie's autograph, Jonesy becoming part of Kylie's security detail, and Kylie falling in love with Wyatt and his songwriting. Meanwhile, Nikki and Jude try to find a way to deal with the Escalator Girls bullying them.

Plot

Main Plot

Caitlin is singing along to a song on the radio when Jen and Nikki arrive. While Jen joins in with the song, Nikki is not enthusiastic at all, as she doesn't enjoy the music. After the song ends, Jen and Caitlin begin discussing Kylie Smylie's essay contest, and Caitlin remarks that she wrote a five thousand word essay for it–disturbing Jen, whose essay was only three thousand words. They then realize that the drawing is about to begin, and Jen's phone rings. Unfortunately for Jen, the call from the contest is to inform her that she didn't win. Nikki's phone then rings, and when Nikki answers she is shocked to hear that she lost as well, even though she didn't enter. Caitlin is the next one to get a call, and this one contains good news–she won!

When Kylie Smiley heads to the mall to spend a day with Caitlin, Caitlin begins to fret that she's not ready. Jonesy then arrives, and informs his friends of the good news: he's been chosen as part of Kylie's security detail, along with Ron and Kylie's father, former professional wrestler Sergeant Beef. Ron's security cart then pulls up, carrying Kylie, Ron, and Sergeant Beef. Kylie introduces herself to Caitlin, who is glad to see her–as Jen would be, if Jen was capable of speech, as she instead blabbers incoherently. Caitlin tries to do something nice for Jen by asking Kylie to take a picture with her friend, but Sergeant Beef refuses to let this happen, and instructs Caitlin to into the cart with Kylie. Unfortunately, this leaves no room for Jonesy, who realizes that as part of his job he'll have to run alongside the security cart all day.

The group sets off, and Nikki comforts Jen over her failure to verbalize a single coherent thought to Kylie. Jen has a solution, however: she'll show up at Kylie's autograph session with a bunch of memorabilia. While Jen comes up with a plan to get to Kylie as a fan, Kylie is busy being pursued by her fans. When Jonesy sees that the fans are gaining, he signals for the cart to go on ahead, and he lets the cart leave him behind so that he can delay the fans.

The riders don't know where they're going, but Kylie does know that she's feeling hungry. She asks Caitlin for a meal suggestion, and Caitlin suggests Burger McFlipster's. Taking Caitlin's advice, they head over to the burger joint, where Wyatt is working the grill. Wyatt doesn't recognize Kylie at all, even though he's given a bunch of hints and even Wayne recognizes her, but when he learns that she's the singer of "Mister Yesterday," he insults the song before he can stop himself. He apologizes by giving Kylie a burger for free, and she invites him to the autograph signing–which Caitlin encourages him to come to. As Caitlin leaves, Wayne notes that for some reason Kylie likes Wyatt, a reaction which even Wyatt doesn't understand.

The signing takes place at Spin This. There is a long line out the door, and in order to ensure that nobody dangerous gets to close to Kylie, Sergeant Beef sends Jonesy out with instructions to get rid of anybody who has more than five items. Naturally, Jen fits this description, and Wyatt walks up as Jonesy goes off to do his duty. Jonesy's conversation with Jen doesn't go well, as Jen ends up being unable to choose, causing a scene, and being dragged out of the line. However, while Jonesy and Sergeant Beef are busy with Jen, Wyatt gets dragged aside by Serena when Serena realizes that Kylie finds Wyatt desirable. Serena informs Wyatt that she's broken up with Chad and wants to get back together with him. Caitlin and Kylie witness this, and Kylie is disappointed, because she wanted to date Wyatt. Caitlin is relieved, however, because Wyatt dating Kylie would result in Sergeant Beef doing bad things to Wyatt. Caitlin's relief is short-lived, though, because Wyatt rejects Serena due to the fact that he's gotten over her, and then informs Caitlin and Kylie about it. When Kylie sees this, she decides to make her move and gives Wyatt her private number.

After the autograph signing, the entourage moves to Taj Mahome Video for another promotional event. Before they leave, Caitlin informs Jonesy about Kylie's crush on Wyatt, and gets Jonesy to inform Wyatt of the problem that he'll have if he dates Kylie. Unfortunately, the phrase Jonesy chooses to use to tell Wyatt about this in a text message is that "Kylie's hot but Beef is dangerous." Wyatt deciphers this as a dig at his job as a burger flipper, and disregards the message.

At Taj Mahome, Kylie is scheduled to do a promo with the Taj Mahome dancers. However, there's been a security breach, as it turns out that Jen has snuck in to try and get a picture with Kylie again. The distraction provides cover for Kylie to sneak out, though, and soon she's singing with Wyatt in the freezer at Burger McFlipster's. After singing a song, though, Kylie realizes that she's going to be late for the show, and heads out into the mall, where she runs into Jen. Upon being directed to the stage, Kylie does Jen a favor and takes a picture with her–just as Sergeant Beef, Ron, and Caitlin show up. Sergeant Beef admits he may have been wrong about Jen, and the group rides to the stage for Kylie's show.

At Kylie's show, Kylie performs "Mister Yesterday" to the delight of the gathered crowd. However, she then stops the show and invites up to the stage her new friend Wyatt. There, they start singing a song that Wyatt has written, but the crowd does not enjoy it. This causes Sergeant Beef to leap onto the stage and pin Wyatt to the ground in rage, ending the song and any chance Kylie might have had of dating Wyatt without her father finding out.

Sub-Plot: Jude and the Escalator Girls

Jude is skating down the escalators, but when he reaches the bottom his underwear is grabbed by the Escalator Girls. Naturally, Jude wants to be released, but his captors are unwilling to do as requested. What they are willing to do, however, is give him a new hat by hiking his underwear up so far that it reaches over his head and covers his eyes.

The next time that Jude goes down the escalators and gets captured, he's careful to inform them that he doesn't want a new hat. Unfortunately, this doesn't stop his captors from tormenting him, as they give him a new outfit instead by pantsing him, tying his shirt so that it bares his midriff, and putting a rose between his teeth before sending him rolling off on his skateboard. He ends up rolling over to Jen and Nikki, who are on their way to the autograph signing, and is encouraged by Nikki to tell off the Escalator Girls the next time that they try to bully him. Unfortunately, this turns out to be poor advice, as his doing this leads to him getting trussed up like a turkey before being set rolling again.

When Nikki sees what the Escalator Girls have done to her friend, she decides to set them straight. The Escalator Girls don't take kindly to her haranguing, though, and their response is to hurl Nikki into a trash can. This only serves to infuriate Nikki, and Nikki begins plotting revenge on them, eventually settling on a plan that involves Jude, a bungee cord, wedgies, and Ron's powers of Mall Security. She sends Jude down the escalator with a bungee cord attached to him that is just long enough that the Escalator Girls try to grab him. When they make this attempt, Jude is pulled back in the other direction before they can get him, but this distracts them enough that Nikki is able to come up behind the Escalator Girls and give them all atomic wedgies. Upon seeing this, Ron cites the Escalator Girls for Indecent Exposure of Underthings, and expels the Escalator Girls from the mall forever.

Quotes

• Jen and Caitlin: EEEEEEEE!
  Nikki: (covering her ears) Ugh!
• Caitlin: We're not fans. We're Smylies!
  Nikki: Smylies? Don't you mean Stalkies?
• Kylie: (on Nikki's phone) Hey, it's Kylie. Sorry–
  Nikki: Aah! Get out of my phone!
  Caitlin: You entered the contest?
  Nikki: As if I would voluntarily taint my phone with that. Must be a prank.
• Caitlin: EEE! I won! EEE!
  Jen: No fair! Two 3000-word essays for nothing!
  Nikki: Two? (She gasps.) You entered me in the contest!
• Caitlin: How's my hair? Is my outfit okay? Anything in my teeth?
  Jen: You look perfect. I'm so happy for you, I could throttle something! Not that I'm jealous.
  Caitlin: It's okay, be jealous! I'm about to go with Kylie to a record signing and a photo op and watch her concert from the front row!
• Jonesy: If anyone can spot a creep, it's me.
  Nikki: Takes one to know one.
• (Jude rides down an escalator but is caught by the Escalator Girls.)
  Jude: Release the gitch, bras!
  Escalator Girl: What did you say?
  Jude: I said could you maybe, um, loosen the grip and let me ride?
  Escalator Girl: No, I think you said you want a new hat! (The Escalator Girls give him a wedgie.)
• Serena: Wyatt! Have you been working out?
  Wyatt: Not unless flipping burgers counts.
  Serena: (laughing) Oh, you! So Chad and I broke up.
  Wyatt: Yeah? But you'll get back together again eventually, right?
  Serena: Not this time. He'll never be the man you are. I shouldn't have let you go.
  Wyatt: Really? Wow. (He looks at Kylie, who is talking with Caitlin.)
  Kylie: Thanks for introducing me to Wyatt. He seems really sweet.
  Caitlin: He's an amazing song writer, too!
  Kylie: Perfect boyfriend material!
  Caitlin: Wyatt? But your dad won't let you date until you're 21.
  Kylie: So what? You can help me! What daddy doesn't know won't hurt him.
  Caitlin: But what Wyatt doesn't know might.
• Jude: Be careful, bra! It's like they all share the same evil brain!
  Nikki: Yeah, hey, Escalator Trolls! Newsflash: you don't own the mall!
  Escalator Girl: (taunting) Aww, wussy brought a body-girl!
  Nikki: Oh, you three need to get a life. And some mouthwash by the reek of it!
  Jude: Easy, Nikki!
  Nikki: You guys think you're so tough!
  Jude: Nikki!
  Nikki: Well you're about as tough as a bi– (She gets picked up by the Escalator Girls.) Aah! Hey, hey put me down! (They throw her into a garbage can.) Whoa! Aah!
  Jude: Tried to warn you, bra.
  Nikki: This! Means! WAR!
• Serena: So, will you give me another chance?
  Wyatt: I can't believe I'm saying this, but, no. (Serena gasps.) I'm sorry, Serena. I never thought I'd get over you, but I guess I have. Maybe it's time for you to do the same.

Trivia

• Goof: Kylie is never seen absconding with Wyatt's guitar, but somehow it's at the show for him, even though Wyatt didn't know that he was going to play with Kylie and she presumably didn't tell anyone else she would play a duet either.
• Goof: A brief overlapping of audio clips can be heard when Kylie is thanking Caitlin for introducing her to Wyatt.
• Jonesy's Job: Part of Kylie's security detail.
  Reason for firing: He tried to fend off Sergeant Beef when Beef attacked Wyatt.
• Kylie Smylie is the second artist that Caitlin and Jen have gone crazy over. The first was the boy band DawgToy in "The Girls in the Band."
• This is the second major appearance of the Escalator Girls. They appeared earlier in "Dirty Work," where they bullied Jen and Stanley.
• Sergeant Beef is a reference to the main character in a series of books by Leo Bruce. In the novels, Sergeant Beef was a police sergeant whose adventures spoofed those of the mystery genre.
• This is Serena's first speaking appearance in Season 4.
• Travis Gibson is apparently a big fan of Kylie Smylie.
• The punishment that Ron gives out at the end is "Indecent Exposure of Underthings", and he punishes it with immediate mall expulsion. This is a callback to "Oops, I Dialed It Again," when Ron placed the law on the books in order to try and get Wyatt kicked out of the mall for life.

Gallery

Caitlin and Jen singing a Kylie Smylie song.

"Aah! Get out of my phone!"

Caitlin cheering because she gets to spend a day with Kylie.

Kylie arrives.

Caitlin with Kylie.

Caitlin talks during the ride.

Sergeant Beef pats Jen on the back.

The Escalator Girls see Jude.

They bully him...

...until Nikki helps Jude get revenge on them.

Videos

This clip was provided by JDD6214 on YouTube.